GAME TEXT UPDATES

Narrator : KBlack
Discus about text/story and post text/story updates and suggestions here.


UPDATES:


25 Sep 2010
View here:
https://docs0.google.com/document/edit?id=1nYcHXXyiF2S7uOEkFlIBh5thrsngB8g0xAR5Wl8o-5I&hl=en&pli=1#
- 3 NPC speeches

27 Sep 2010
View here:
https://docs.google.com/document/edit?id=1-GymrHInG_k7v-0HwJuulhXtjFCixEYdX1sb2MqK41k&hl=en
- added 8 more NPC speeches

New version:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/15kGkrHkOzK09FiigQdItWifE0AC9Eek0zKO-D2MIKKg/edit?hl=en#

Added 7 characters including the whole first bar, in which I tried to make a few references about the war. As always: Tell me what you think, notify me of any error.

Following Ramos' advice, I changed Elvis's class from hacker to samurai and Johnson's name to Smith (to dissociate our work from its shadowrun roots a little).

BTW Ramos, I already wrote Ryan as a reaper, I though it was obvious. If you have any suggestion to make it more explicit, go ahead.

I'll start fleshing out the story and writing serious missions sunday. Expect at least one complete sample mission to be done by sunday night, that way if I don't go the way that is expected, I can correct it pretty fast. Is that okay with you all?

Sounds good , SADoff already implemented the NPC interactions huds today and i must say it looks very VERY HOT + he added a bar minigame , when he puts the final text in place we will post the new version on the official page .

Ill pm you what text for what chars we need next but for now i must finish the weapons for map characters and im also working on some pictures describing the current universe that ill post here to help you with your text or if you finish text for the main story first ill remake the art accordingly to your text

I think about 2 more weeks starting today and we reach BETA stage

In the scenario, I changed the city's name from "CoveredDust" to "Dust Cove". Just rolls off the tongue, doesn't it? More seriously, if that's okay with y'all, I prefer this one. There's something with 2-word names that makes them easier to remember, and using "Cove", which is an actual geographical landmark, makes the name sound more like an actual city name. Plus it evokes the fact that dust sets in there and stays there.

Ok, maybe I'm late to make this proposal... I don't know...
Well, I thought it would be cool if we gave certain NPCs and places names that were some kind of references to cyberpunk and stuff (somehow like that awesome Hellowners instead of Halloweeners from Shadowrun, Zeus instead of Ares... Little Athena... well, I would have chosen Little Night City -being another district in the Tokio of Neuromancer just like Chiba City).
Ok, these are some I came up with, then you tell me or rate this comment whether you support or like it or you don't:

- Four mutant (green mutants) samurais called : Leon, Ralph, Mitch and Dom instead of Leo(nardo), Raph(ael), Mike(michaelangelo), Don(natello), the teenage mutant ninja turtles. What has this got to do with cyberpunk? Well the original TMNT comic was a parody to Frank Miller's Ronin.

- A hacker called Duke Duo instead of Count Zero (he has to be human, and have a look that is some kind a mixture between a goth and a punk, oh, and look young).

- For the moon colony in the online multiplayer version, some rerferences to Neuromancer could be names of streets in freeside: instead of Rue Jules Verne, Isaac Asimov Street... oh, and if you want something to insert on conversations on robots, the ones on I robot had positronic brains made of a spongelike globe of platinum iridium.

More Sprawl trilogy references:

As names of NPCs:

- A Johnson or whatever you end up calling them, called Bruce Largo as a reference to Willis Corto AKA Armitage from Neuromancer. He would respond to the orders of an A.I. named SummerScream and mention it as a reference to the A.I. WinterMute that commands him in his mission in Neuromancer.

- A software seller (maybe in a normal shop for hackers) called One-per-Head as a refference to the Software provider Twice-a-Day in Count Zero. He would work for Belair (a reference to Beauvoir) and Luke (Lucas).

- A gang called Hardkores as a refference to the Kasuals in Count Zero. If you yet need more gangs, and don't think Halloweeners and Gothicks are the same you could include the Darqies as a Gothic urban tribe (check out the nightlife in Matrix I)

More Shadowrun Genesis Refferences:

- OK, I've seen you refference the Halloweeners as Hellowners Gang. Need more gangs? What about the Fiber Optix instead of the Eye Fivers?

Yep we will implement all that you said above except the gang cause we will only have 1 city and 1 gang in this first version but in next version yes we will have "fiber optics" in seattle

be careful, in a game like this usually the story is very important , if the player reaches half of the game(supposing that the game lasts more than 2 hours) he will need a strong feeling for the game to continue playing , so the plot needs more work , something like fallout

Ok, here are some things I came up with, apart from races you told me I'm writing some slight background for the classes and, since this all reminded me of that computer in Junkers HQ in Snatcher, and also Appleseed Databook and Hypernotes, and Shadowrun Books, some short articles on worldview, story and counter culture. I don't know which other enemies are going to be there in the game, so I thought this would fit better with me. Ah, IMPORTANT, also don't forget to change that "bestiarity" for "bestiary", the first is not correct and makes me think of some sick sexual tendencies (vomits) XD

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On races:

MUTANTS (ORCS): Brand of species resulting of various experiments on forced and/or parallel evolution and hybridization in super-soldier projects. Known to be buffed in complexion, having tough green skin and tendency to being aggressive. Other observations must be noted: males have YY chromosomes, and females XXX chromosomes, which takes important rootings on breeding and selection. Being trained with VR and narcotics to show loyalty and skill, It has become a major concern that they have begun to show un submissive and freelancing behaviour on orc individuals rejecting militarization.

BIOGENES (ZAMOLXIAN): Brand of bioroid species genetically engineered and trained as an important part of the terraformation and colonization of extraterrestrial worlds plan "Blue Beam". Their cellular composition has been altered with exposure to radiation therapy on ozone molecules, that resulting in their blue skin feature. They are also known for their goblin ears and bleached white hair. Their congenital sterility aimed to control clone reproduction has been rumored to be a barrier broken by specially intelligent specimens that would have gone freelance and started to found their own extraterrestrial nations out of human hands reach.


On classes:

REAPER: Freelancing professionals most prominently off suited from military or paramilitary forces. Known to be excellent snipers and big gun wielders, their fetish on heavy weapons and heavy armor uses to take them on war gear smuggling businesses and on corporations' private wars. (THIS WOULD BE A BLANK TO FILL IN WITH SKILLS AS SOON AS I FIND OUT WHICH ARE THEY ... OR MAYBE AN ARTICLE PER SKILL, WHO KNOWS, YOU'LL TELL ME )

SAMURAI: Whether real trained black ops specialists, yakuza ronins, or antisocial punks with a taste for bad martial arts flicks; street samurais are a conglomerate of martial arts weaponry and training. They feel the hots for handmade work since in the way of the samurai it all comes to hand to hand combat, and sometimes work in the shadows with state of the art ninja gear such as thermoptics camouflage. (AGAIN THE GAP, I'M REALLY ENJOYING THIS, HOPE YOU LIKE THE LANGUAGE, I'M AN ENGLISH TEACHER INDEED).

HACKERS: Thieves of intangible goods, information. Usually bored code monkeys that play on both sides, or otaku technofetishists that have braincord implants in order to dive into the virtualization of the matrix. As expected, they are not especially skilled in combat, so they might need to hire dumb muscle for their wired corporation breakings, as well as some light self defense firepower. (THE INFAMOUS GAP).


On worldview, society, counterculture, politics and geography:

PALINDROMIC NATION: It's the title of a controversial book by satyric fanzine editor Edgar Told converted into sociologist, analyzing the state of the legitimacy of the sovereign territory of North America, now in hands of several industrial corporations as a fee by the indebted governments for debts contracted in war times.

ORC PROTECTORATE: National construct that includes the territories previously forming the american near-middle east protectorates. After the incapable government of the USA lost its power to the corporations, the mutant cannon fodder of the American Military Forces established their homeland in these territories. The measure has inspired several punk derivative mutant countercultures.

ELDAR FLAGSHIP EVENTS: Is the name given to the currently uncertain incidents involving rioting on notable pioneering terraformation spaceship, by hands of roguish Biogene Bioroid workers. It has been pointed as a concern for human security. This has derived on anti-parahuman violence and equally violent countermeasures by united Biogene individuals.

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So, this is all at the moment, hope you like it. I think it helps create an environment and might guide players and staff into the next morpg installment. If you find something offensive or contradictory, we might change that.

I think we can use some of them in the game wikipedia like mutants info(but specify "first appearance the war of nations also known as project super-soldier") , BIOGENE its perfect we will use that , on classes is good but for samurai add a more general statement like last comparable something like "or just simple hand to hand combat" , nice work man